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Building Meaningful Relationships as an Adult

By admin | August 31, 2009

My friend
Image by Scarleth White via Flickr

Friendships are an important part of life. Studies show that having deep, meaningful connections helps with both your physical and mental health. Friendships boost your immune system and help you curb depression and anxiety. So how do you go about building such relationships as an adult?

•    Meet people doing activities you are passionate about. We often relate to people with whom we have a lot in common. Take a class you have always wanted to try. Perform some charity work that you have been putting off. The more you engage in activities and events that make you happy, the easier it will be to meet people who are passionate about the same things as you. And since you share common interests, it will be easier to get to know them and develop a connection.


•    Meet people at work. Most of us spend at least 40 hours a week (if not more) at our job. Even if you don’t love your job, there are probably people there with whom you share some connection. Invite them out to lunch and begin to share a little bit about your life outside of work. The more you share, the more your connection will increase.
•    Take a risk and reach out. Friendships are often built by taking a risk and reaching out to someone. Whether it is beginning to chit-chat with your neighbors, joking around with someone at the office picnic or calling up a casual acquaintance to meet for coffee – building friendships as an adult requires taking a chance. Not everybody will respond, but it will be worth the risk for the ones who do.
•    Realize it takes work to build a strong connection. Deep, meaningful friendships take time to develop. Although there may be a spark of chemistry between two people, if it is not nurtured and developed, it will not lead to a deeper connection. Call to check in on friends, ask them what is really going on, be there for them in their time of need. Just as intimate relationships take time and effort to build, so do good, solid friendships.
•    Let go of friendships that are no longer working. Sometimes, we don’t have the time or energy to develop new friendships because we are still investing so much time in people who no longer serve us. Even though old connections may be a source of comfort and security, they may no longer be serving your real needs. Take the time to assess whether you really enjoy spending time with some of your old friends. If you don’t, begin to limit the energy you put into those friendships and invest that time in getting to know new people.

Meeting and developing new friends as an adult does not need to be a difficult process. Being open-minded, taking risks and being willing to connect are the only things required to making and building the connections you desire in your life. Begin to take the steps today towards creating the relationships you want in your life.

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